Dating was invented in the Jurassic period between 1066 – and 1363 which is the time when the official language of England wasn’t English. It was French. IS THIS A COINCEDENCE? No. No it is not. We real men are able to find out facts and link them to them to whatever we like. Such as the French who had to go and invent a language where manly grunts are not acceptable. Because there was a shortage of heavily muscled hero type guys like myself until the mid 1980s, women began to want to “seek” out a man who could provide her with essential necessities in life, such as 7 or more inches. To do this, she would make a series of tasks to filter out the weak and unneeded, and just use them for DATING. This would mean the “man” would spend money on food, wine and puppies and never get a good hard shag. Some clever men found a way to bypass that, they just gave the women the money and were able to get some play. When a woman sees a real man such as myself, there is no need for dating. Just the natural urge to feel a real man.
FIVE SIMPLE STEPS TO GAURENTEE YOU SOME ACTION
- Never pay girls compliments, when you compliment a girl it shows you are needy. What you need to do instead is “neg” her. Give her a negative remark, like “oh, you look fat” or “your hair makes your ears look big” this will make her feel vulnerable and see you as some sort of hero who can protect her. She will also be grateful for attention from you. This is a must.
- Always boast about past achievements, to show you are competitive and an alpha male. For example, today I beat Brick in a foot race from the kitchen up the stairs. This shows I am physically superior to him, and thus my sperm is better. Girls love this sort of stuff. Nothing is too small. Remember that time you found £10 in your wallet? Brag about it. Or say how much better you are at stuff then other people. Especially her. Tell her how worthless she is and how much better you could do if you weren't so desperate.
- Touch her a lot to make her know you are a red blooded male and you want to do her. This makes her feel horny and special at the same time. Ogle her. Girls love being stared at, they love attention. It makes them horny. They can never be touched enough. Just go straight for special places and say words loudly such as "I'm getting some of this for me tonight" If you’re lucky. Someone will hear you and think you are getting some of that. Even if you’re not.
- Don’t be scared to pass wind, sneeze, pick, itch, cough or let loose in anyway. By allowing yourself to do this, you are being in touch with your feelings and emotions. Girls love this. Shows you’re caring and stuff. Of course, you’re not, but it gets them into bed so who cares.
- Memorize 100 jokes, and say them all as fast as you can one after the other. This shows you are a hilarious comedian and are able to brighten up any party, and you never ever become boring. Make sure you laugh at everyone of them though, because if nobody else finds it funny and nobody laughs at your jokes you will look like a real dork.
Final Thoughts
First of all, no one wants to listen to you talk. You have already bored me thinking about you talking. I'm not talking about anyone in particular, just women in general. All men feel the same. A woman should be seen, touched, but not heard. Unless you are telling us how good we are a) In bed b) and in competitive sports.
The less you say, the better.
Whilst a lot of the above is going to be new to a lot of you idiots out there, trust me, it works. Using these methods I have even tricked a girl into letting me hold her hand. It never hurts to be forceful either, and direct. I often scream "Get your fucking trousers off now" On the off chance that the woman is a real bitch, you may end up getting hit round the head by a hand bag, husband or maced. If however you flash a £20 note and it’s at the right time of day, she will be prepared to give you some sexy time. There is no replacement for a great smile, bear that in mind. The best way to get a good smile is to jerk it through your pocket (cut a whole in them). This increases your chances of doing it by almost 8%.
Yours in manliness,
Fantana
